"I'm never going to be the kind of mom that......(fill in "wrong-doing" here)."
Apart from the horrid things a parent can do to a child, I quickly figured out that it was not fair for me to say such things, even if was saying it in my head. When I see a mother or father do something that might seem a little off, now I think:
"I wonder what kind of day they've had. Did they sleep well? Is their kid tired or feeling ill? What kind of "me time" did they have if any? Did they get to take a shower? (Isn't it funny how a nice long shower is a luxury?)"
Whenever I had come to realize that I had just done the thing I said I would never do as a mother, I ended up feeling a bit let down at myself. I had put myself on this crazy standard of parenting that doesn't exist. I had to let those "nevers" go because who knows what kind of day I'll have with my daughter.
Sometimes when you need to get something done and a little one might not be cooperating, and you know of one thing that will help you get through that small moment in time, just do it. I had to let go of people who might be watching or saying comments under their breath. Yup, it was my kid scream-singing, crying, who made the mess, who spilled the drink/cheerios, running in a crowd, refusing to walk, and any other thing she was doing.
Just like every adult human being on the planet, a child has free will.
And I have a stash of chocolate in my purse/backpack/car at all times.
